depression
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This has bothered me for a long time but I’ve never really known myself. I know most of the human population could say that about themselves but I mean in the context of thriving and doing things that make me happy. It was watching the headline act at Glastonbury festival on Saturday night, Coldplay, that Read more
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Last year I stayed at a B&B down south with my narcy ex called “Gunnado”. I didn’t get it at first. I pronounced it “Gunardo”. It’s actually pronounced “Gunn-a-do” – you know, I’m gunna do it. Simply because the owners had the flat on their ‘gunna-do-it” list. Didn’t realise that flat was an oracle telling Read more
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I’ve spiralled over the past few days, since last Thursday. I’ve been feeling depressed, lost, with no feeling or purpose, no direction, lost in the wilderness of my life (again – I’ve been here before) and the same compulsive thoughts flying around my mind that I can’t seem to get rid of. I got up Read more
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I sat down to write something else but have been massively triggered by everything that someone else is doing and being and everything I’m not. I’m not going to say who I’ve looked at and what I’ve read. I am in tears and I weep the tears of sorrow and sadness and regret and resentment Read more
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I’m struggling to write today. I feel flat. My beloved pet cat has stressed me out to the max acting like a spoilt teenager (although he’s 7 so that makes him 49 in human years). I haven’t written for a few days and pissed off as I made a commitment to myself to write every Read more
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I had a cold shower again this morning and did my pranayama (I hate the term “breath work”) It’s fucking pranayama, why don’t people use the correct terminology and give it the credence it deserves???? And I do the funny eye movements (look it up online, resetting the vagus nerve through eye movements). Those things Read more
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I’m not going to tell anyone my name, who I am, where I live etc. It’s inconsequential. Anonymity in a digital world is priceless. A writer is what I should have become all my life and a huge part of me that I left on the shelf at 16-ish, (because I was angry with the Read more