Healing My Childhood Trauma

A Personal Memoir

depression

  • one year of healing…

    I’m wondering if anything has really changed or healed since I started this memoir a year ago….whether the little girl in me is unfrozen from time and released from the anguish she’s been trapped in for decades. I pondered last year when I started the blog: ‘I wonder where I’ll be a year from now”,… Read more

  • undigested pain…part 2

    ….a continuation (there’s too much to say…) The unholy trinity abandoned us knowing all of the dangers, without any warning, without a conversation; devoid of an explanation, without a care in the world. They were like sisters to me. I’d grown up with them from a baby. They were all I knew and I loved… Read more

  • My mental health has taken a huge nose-dive this past week. I’m still fragile. Extremely. I feel like I’ve collapsed from within. My emotions are teetering and simmering on the surface and I’m edgy as hell. Very edgy. I’m crying easily over seemingly minor issues and I feel weak from within; all my inner strength… Read more

  • My anxiety has a voice. It’s only very recently I’ve realised that it’s the voice of chronic anxiety (although I hate labels like that). It’s a negative voice by default constantly popping up in all kinds of scenarios warning me of some impending doom. But I don’t think it (meaning the voice) or me are… Read more

  • alone-ness…

    My lack of real friends and closeness with others is bothering me and has been for over a week. I got triggered last week by someone I consider a friend (but who clearly doesn’t feel the same way about me) who I knew was sweeping me aside. You can tell what’s going on from text… Read more

  • leaky boundaries…

    Is leaky boundaries like leaky gut sydrome where toxins leak in and out? I have to face facts that I have boundaries like a tea bag (although I like to think I’m oh so together). I say this because of what happened a few days ago when I went to a small event about writing.… Read more

  • unassuaged grief…

    As usual my posts are irregular, haphazard and disorderly. But I did say that I’d post when I had something to say rather than trying to scrape out something for the continuity and hell of it. When writing from the heart, it has to be from the heart, that’s when it makes the biggest impact.… Read more

  • cry baby…

    So…I burst into tears in front of a group of women I’d never met before (this happened last week). I tell one lie – I knew one of them (not the other 7). It seems like I have a load more healing to do… Here’s what happened: I bumped into The One I Know at… Read more

  • Yes I’ve been silent for a month or so (again) and yes I know, I’m not keeping the promises to myself to document this healing journey as often as I should. Should is a heavy word. But at the same time, I can’t and won’t pressure myself. This is my journey of healing and it’s… Read more

  • I’ve just read one of my previous posts Solace is Golden, and I know I’ve regressed. For the past 3 weeks since I re-surfaced to share my healing, I’ve not been able to cope with my emotions. I haven’t written in recent weeks as the emotional overload has left me feeling deflated and depressed with… Read more